Thursday, June 11, 2009

Return of the Rubber Mac

My Fellow Inmates,


So after an interminable delay and many messages from many good people advising me that not only they read my blog and please continue, but beyond that my 2 month absence had caused some concern to many...

Well here I am to let you know that I have not been raped, kidnapped or stuffed in to a trunk of a 1984 AMC Gremlin on its way to Tijuana with duct tape over my mouth and a Mr S Bigboy in my ass...

This is not saying this would be a bad thing mind you...

I just realized that I had been so busy that the last update of pictures or Video came from Rubberfreak's visit in February...

I actually have very few excuses... all I can say is the nurses ran out of the good stuff and I have been locked in solitary in a leather jacket and metal mask as they have continuously made the futile attempt at stabilization...

While in the happy delusion of normality that we all harbor as the backstage staff continues to medicate us, we have bought a new asylum and are remodeling it as we speak...

Let me tell you... There is nothing more miserable than 5 hours in a respirator as you are scraping the next section of popcorn ceiling praying the former was your last...

As the sweat builds up between the mask and your face the interest in gasmasks and respirators begins to wane. You realize what a miserable reality this concept is and begin to pray for the fantasy to drift back in like a nitrous haze upon a tortured mind...

Basically it sucks...

And that is where yours truly has been for the last few months...

But as the sun sets on the new undertaking, we realize what kind of playspaces asylum will be left with...

and once again it’s worth it...

I also must share that asylum learned what kind of misery that a concept called Chiggers are....

We got hit with these a few days ago...

They are now gone as we fogged for them...

Why would I share this?

I must say, I don’t know if anyone has ever been bitten on the shaft of the dick by a bug before, but for the last few days I have had the most intense orgasms I have ever had...

Viva Los Chiggers...

it is a feeling I have never had... an intensity that is unmatched and unrivaled...

very few things alter my orgasms. Previously the only thing that could change the typical "stroke, stroke, gasp, cum" was Marijuana...

Yea I know it’s a drug and I know a lot of you do not agree with it and that is fine... I haven’t touched it in two years...

But when I did, well... OH MY FUCKING GOD!!!!... My cum factory was paying overtime...

No don’t get me wrong, I am not saying one should try pot as it will make your orgasms echo ten fold from their normal standpoints… It hits everyone differently, it may make you just sag in to the couch with a bag of lays purchased upon your bulbous belly that continues to grow with every puff of the pipe…

Or it could make you paint the ceiling….

In fact the last time I tried pot I ended up in the emergency room with a hardcore panic attack, finding myself being injected with emergency tranquilizers to try to offset the drugs coursing through my system…

Not what I would recommend… But the emergency tranqs… DAMN!!!... Run me a tab and set me up an extra order to go please, shaken not stirred. J

Asylum is an open book…. As always… no remorse no apologies...

Also one more piece of great news that just happened yesterday…

Asylum’s Roommate “WetsuitJay” is now Asylum’s Partner “WetsuitJay”…

I have never in my life met a bigger pain in my ass, and a sweeter person. The perfect mix to keep boredom staved off…

Life is good…

Now to just find a team of unregistered illegal’s fresh over the boarder from Mexico city with a paint can in one hand, a hammer in the other, and a healthy fear of the term “La Migra”…

Well then the house should be done fairly quickly…

As always Fuck PC! Asylum is back J

With that visiting time is over and the guards grow antsy…

Take care, and what ever you do don't scream too loud, others are trying to sleep

Rubberasylum